Don't Start With What Doesn't Work

I think I have decided what makes this different from a lot of other diets, food plans, or food related programs.

This program is based on your mental health, your cognitive capabilities and reducing suffering.

Jillian Michaels, one of my all time favorite trainers, always seem to give off the impression of no mercy, YOU DON'T LIKE IT- IT FEELS TOO HARD TO YOU- WELL TOUGH!

And she's pretty scary, so I think if I had her yelling in my ear I'd be able to do what she had to say also.

But in the real world, when people CAN'T do something, I turn around and ask- well what part of that CAN you do?

You can't give up having a beer on the weekend? Fine, no problem let's work around that. You can't workout more than twice a week- ok let's start there- and see if the person can give five more minutes of push ups and sit ups at some point during their week. You don't like vegetables? Ok- what fruit do you like? What vegetables would you be willing to try? How about with a sauce?

We build for success. We take what people can do and build off of that. We don't push them down a tunnel and say GO without making sure they feel equipped to do it.

A lot of people tell me that they're told in order to lose weight they must stick to 1200 calories, no if, ands or buts. And certainly they cannot add in extra calories for exercise.

Now that might work for some people. But for people that have tried, tried again, and tried some more to lose weight and keep it off- why would we start there?

Let's start with 1600 calories, stick to that, deal with the sabotaging thoughts and hard situations that arise at that level, and give lots of 'high-fives' for accomplishing that for a few weeks.

Then let's move down to 1400- and see how that feels. After that feels good, maybe just maybe, we'll move down to 1200.

But finite numbers with no wiggle room are mentally unhealthy to me. Between 1200-1400? Now that sounds like a range that someone can handle.

What if one week they exercise a lot? Or go to a once in a life time party? or have the stomach flu for a few days?

Rigid numbers are prison bars that don't resemble the real world we live in.

My next blog post will be about the "sufferring" theory of healthy life changes. But for now let's just end with this:

In order to make a change you need a food plan:
-that has some flexibility
-that feels doable
-that works in treats and things that make you happy
-that considers the amount of exercise you do
-that doesn't feel like you're holding your breathe until its over

And if a plan sounds too hard- ask yourself what pieces you can start with- and then slowly but surely- giving yourself a lot of credit for what you are able to accomplish- move your way up. Build on your competency- don't drive yourself to failure by starting with something that wasn't meant for beginners, eating or exercise wise.

Let's hope for a 2014 filled with habits that make us feel good about ourselves, our capabilities, our resistance muscles, our forgiveness muscles, and our healthy habits as a whole.

Its Cold- Do I Have to Get Off The Couch?

The short answer to this question- is "YES YOU DO"

Now the long answer.

Cold slows us down, it makes our bodies want to kick into hibernate mode.

Exercising, whether its running, going to a class, doing a DVD at home, all include things that are not fun when it's cold. Those reasons are, but not limited to:
-changing your clothes
-leaving your house
-moving around without a blanket and slippers
-taking a break from sipping coffee, hot chocolate, or tea
-exerting effort when not being forced to so by children, spouses, bosses, grocery store clerks or street sanitation workers

Not fun right?

But here's the thing- we NEED to exercise- and truthfully, when we allow ourselves to think about it logically, we want to exercise. And, oddly enough, exercise actually warms us up and gets our blood flowing to our hands and feet which are sometimes the coldest of all.

There are some cognitive, and behavioral things we can do to make this work- ready for what they are? No- common, we'll do this together- I know you can do it:
-Write a 'Response Card' which you keep in your wallet, on the wallpaper of your phone, next to your bed, and stapled on your forehead that says:
'THE HEALTHY PERSON I WANT TO BE INCLUDES REGULAR EXERCISE- I WILL BE SO HAPPY AND PLEASED WITH MYSELF WHEN I AM FINISHED- JUST DO IT!
or something like that

Behaviorally- don't let yourself go to sleep, read a book, call a friend, or in some other way hold yourself hostage, UNTIL YOU EXERCISE

Meeting up with a friend is a GREAT idea

As is pre-paying for a class!

Chart which days you worked out and what you did- you'll love looking back at all of the hard work.

Reward yourself with coffee with friends, new workout clothes, and 'you go girl' shouting on a regular basis.

Ok- its time to stop blogging- and go exercise- wish me luck- I know I'll be happy about it in a few minutes :)

The Power of a Craving

The feeling is there and it's intense.

I want the chocolate

I need the chocolate

I will have the chocolate

It consumes you, blocks your thoughts, stops your productivity, and makes you down right cranky.

I find that especially small little things, like chocolate covered almonds, M&M's, or things like that are the most deadly.

"They're so small, 2 or 3 won't make a difference"- my mind always tries that trick on me- because in the past it always worked.

My favorite author and expert on this topic Dr. Judith Beck suggests an experiment: she calls it the Hunger Experiments (not to be confused with the Hunger Games- trust me- though equal in brutality, these are two very different events)

She would probably label little chocolates a trigger food for me, and here's how the experiment works. Take your trigger food- buy it and bring it home. Prepare all the reasons why you want this (your advantages) prepare a list of distracting activities to do, and picture yourself strong and confident. Then take your trigger food, open it in front of you. Smell it, hold on, and keep on doing it until that intense craving feeling fills your being.

Then note the time, pick up the food, throw it in the garbage, and walk away (if tempted to garbage eat, which we know every person does at some point in their life, consider pouring vinegar on it as well).

If you're upset about the waste of food- I hear you- but that food is not food, it's garbage- and the question is whether its going to rot in your stomach or in the garbage can.

Go do your distracting activity, call a friend, go for a walk, play a game, read a book, DO SOMETHING ELSE AND GET DISTRACTED.

When its over, note the time, and how long it took for the intensity to go away.

Then write down a memory, either in your journal, your date book, or on an index card that says "on this day, i resisted, I walked away, I distracted, and I was strong- I can do it'.

Does this solve the issue or cravings no? Does it mean that when you're at someone else's party you can go over to the refreshment table and throw away the trays so that you don't eat the craving food? Well maybe, but don't expect to every be invited anywhere again.

What it does mean is that your are stating to plant a seed in your brain that knows, that is sure, that you CAN DO IT. That when it comes down to it YOU ARE STRONG and YOU CAN RESIST. And slowly but surely you will crave that feels of strength as much as you crave the chocolate.

Additionally- once I felt that I was in control of the amount, I also planned in treats for myself of these little chocolate goodies. That way I don't feel deprived- I ate it when I planned on it and stuck to a set amount.

So do I find myself still reaching for the small candy bowl absent mindedly or with evil intent? Absolutely- but I work on myself- and I celebrate every victory where I'm able to withstand the urge. And I forgive myself easily when I don't.

So what do you think? Are you game for a little experiment?

Sometimes You Need to Give In.....

Seeing something delicious but less than healthy (that you really want to eat!) can be challenging to resist.

Coming home after a really long day, feeding your family dinner, cleaning up from the long day, and then being faced with a box of Oreos is hard to resist.

Being invited to your friends birthday party where you planned on only sticking to the fruits and vegetables- to then find out that she's serving your absolute favorite dessert takes a really strong iron will to overcome.

But do you always have to walk away?

The answer, especially once you're at a healthy weight, and even if you're still in "weight loss" mode is no, you don't always have to have a zero tolerance rule.

If anything- sometimes the amount of emotional energy it will take to completely walk away may not be worth your while in that moment.

So should you give in and eat what you want when you want? Well obviously no- and if you're interested in this blog you probably already knew the answer to that.

When faced in situations like the ones above you have three options:

1.you can say no, strengthen your 'resistance muscle' and walk away

2.you can say yes- but decide ahead of time the amount- and make it a smaller amount then you would normally have (2 Oreos instead of 4, half a piece of cake instead of a jumbo size, 10 tortilla chips instead of 20).

3. If you were planning to have a "treat" food the next day you can ask you yourself- do I want this more than the treat food I'm having tomorrow? If yes- then go for it and skip the planned treat. If not- use the treat food to keep yourself from eating the food right in front of you.

As always, the moral of the story is- make a plan- and insert a thought process into your food eating. You don't have to live without the food you love- you just need to put it in it's proper place and time.

With Chanukah and Thanksgiving upon us- there has never been a better time to practice the skills of planning ahead and when tempted- choosing from the options above.

Good Luck! Enjoy life and Stay Healthy!

It's Not Fair......

When it comes to food, weight, and body type- how many of you have thought the following:

-Look at what she's eating, and yet she still looks so skinny, she doesn't ever have to work at it- IT'S NOT FAIR
-Everyone else can stop after one cookie at a party and I can't- IT'S NOT FAIR
-Other people can find the time to exercise, but it just doesn't fit into my schedule- IT't NOT FAIR
-Here I am out for dinner with my big extended family and everyone is enjoying themselves and eating whatever they want while I'm depriving myself so I can fit into a dress next month- IT'S NOT FAIR
-She just had a baby three weeks ago and she already fits back into her clothing- while I had my "baby" 3 years ago and am still three sizes bigger- IT'S NOT FAIR

While all of these might be "fair" statements to make- they don't help you in the slightest. And actually- they do the opposite- they make it harder for you to achieve what you want in your health life.

Everyone is born with different abilities, predispositions, physical limitations, intelligences, and they're all highly personal.

Unfortunately for us we live in a society that worships thin bodies- So even though we all have different strengths- we are obsessed with people who we perceive that healthy eating, an athletic body, and low weight come "naturally" to them.

Next time you catch yourself playing the "fairness" game- ask yourself this:
-If you compare yourself to all of the people who you perceive look "better" than you- do you also compare yourself to all the people who don't look as good as you? Ofcourse not- or at least most people don't- so why is it fair that you're always comparing yourself unfairly?
-You're making an assumption about someone- how do you know what their health life looks like?
-Your health goals, your ability to eat healthy, and exercise often- is all about you, and has nothing to do with other people. 
-We all have our strengths and weaknesses- food or exercise might be your weakness- choose to "accept" that- don't spend so much energy fighting it anymore- and turn all of that jealousy, anger, bitterness, longing- into the motivation that helps you meet your goals.

Prepare yourself - life isn't created on a perfect scale and very few things in life appear to be even, especially when compared. You need to create a cognitive response for yourself- that when you start thinking any of the thoughts above you then immediate replace it with this:

"Life isn't about fairness, its above succeeding and overcoming my own personal challenges. I want to be healthy for me, and only me. Eating healthy and exercise is more than just about weight- it's about life and the way I am choosing to live it. If I have to try harder than some people, so be it, I accept that. I am going to stop wasting my time and energy worrying about it- and instead am going to go kick butt at my next workout"

My next group is starting a week from Sunday- If you're interested please let me know- otherwise- stop worrying about "fair" and what the other girl looks like- and go enjoy a healthy life.

The Power of Goals and Rewards

Yesterday was a special day for me.

I'm going to go backwards for a minute. When I started this cognitive program to lose weight, I was asked to write a list of advantages. I had to make a list, that said: "if I could achieve my goal and lose the weight I wanted, what would be better in my life that would make it worth it to do all this work."

One of the things I had listed was to be able to run faster. I love running, which I know not everybody does. But it's part of how I keep myself healthy- body and soul. I try to run actual 'races' a few times a year so that I can see whether or not I have gotten faster.

Its a fact, the lighter you are, the faster you can run. And the more you work on strength training, building cardio endurance, fueling your body with foods that help your body move instead of slowing it down- the faster you can run.

A few months ago I signed up to do a half marathon through the national park in the Indiana Sand Dunes. It promised to be a gorgeous course, flat, and good weather. What I didn't count on was how few people were going to be there- but always up for a good experience, my friend Wendy and I bravely toed the starting line yesterday morning.

My race plan was simple. Run slower than I wanted to in the first 6 miles, run the pace I wanted for the next 4 miles, and then gun it and run out everything I had left in the last three miles. As I was running I reviewed in my mind all of the workouts that had gotten me here (an excellent cognitive tool to boost confidence btw). And I remembered what it had been like to run with those 35 extra pounds that I had on my body frame just two short years before now. My mind was busy and my legs kept moving- but it was a great day for me- I just felt good and content the whole way through. I ran through forests of changing leaves, past the beautiful Lake Michigan lake front, and through marshy high grass- and it was honestly breathe-takingly gorgeous.

In the last three miles, I let it rip. I ran each mile faster than the next, and almost cried with relief when I saw the finish line. I zoomed through and looked at my time. 1:50:33- a great time, and very close to hitting almost all of the goals I had set for myself.

But here's where it gets funny. Because this was SUCH a small race and a first time event- I placed first place in my age group of 30-34 aged women. I can't even tell you how funny and shocking this is, and how in any other race in the Chicagoland area with that time I might have placed in the top 100, maybe.

I got my medal in an awards ceremony, took the picture above, and chuckled to myself the whole way home. But here's where it gets interesting. On the way home I started craving snickers bars and cheese curls. And I wanted them now!

My brain said "Rach- you deserve it, you put in the work, you ran your heart out this morning- let's go raid a 7/11".

But another piece of me, the piece that this Healthy Habits program has created said "Rach- you only were able to run this way because of all of the times you didn't give in to cravings- wasn't this morning's experience the reward you actually wanted?"

And you know what- the second voice prevailed. Instead of junk- I instead splurged on a large hamburger for dinner, which would actually help my muscles heal through iron and protein. That race time and that age group award, that was what I had been dreaming about all those days on weight watchers, all those workouts when I was too tired, and what I had been focused on when eating healthy seemed just to hard.

So what are your goals? What are your advantages? If you can keep those reasons in mind, read them through EVERY DAY, and want them bad enough, you can achieve any healthy goal you desire. I achieved a little bit of mine yesterday. And it was more rewarding than any Snickers bar could be.

Inspired on the car ride home.....

Tonight I went to Zumba with Tziporah Gelman, and it was amazing as usual.

My usual ride home needed to make a couple of stops, so a different zumba go-er offered to give me a ride.

While we were driving I asked her how long she has been going to zumba and she said she has been going for awhile and she tries to go every Monday night.

I complimented her for being consistent and she said something so inspiring and strong- but I doubt she even knows how amazing it was.

She said: "I just made it so that it's not a choice. Every Monday night I go. I don't decide each week, or think about how I'm feeling once 8 o clock rolls around. Every Monday it's not a choice, I put my gym shoes on and I go".

There is no cognitive skill stronger than this one. Judith Beck talks about this concept in her book that I base a lot of my program on, it's called the "NO CHOICE" response.

If you have decided that you are going to exercise at a certain time, eat a certain amount for dinner, or abstain from a certain treat- there's no choice. If you truly believed this, and if you truly have made the commitment- the voices in your head fighting against you wouldn't stand a chance!

Often we need behavioral reminders of this helpful cognitive tool. Making notes in your calendar, on your phone, or keeping a NO CHOICE note-card in your wallet can be a helpful way to remind yourself of the path you want to take when it comes to your health life. It's shouldn't be seen as a burden- it's a step in the right direction towards training our brains to treat our bodies the way they want to be treated.

It's not a tool that you'll use to keep yourself from treats or breaks all the time- because that wouldn't be cognitively healthy either- but you can consciously decide which things in your life can be put in this NO CHOICE category.

Whether you decide to join my group or not- think to yourself- which of your health choices can you make this concept work for?

What can you decide and be brave enough to put into the category of "no choice"........